ERrrrrrrrrrg!

There are few things in the world that I hate more than hospitals, and especially so when its I, who has to be there. The smell, the feelings, the sounds, the no cell phone rule, the food (gag), the sick people, the waiting rooms, the co-pays, the bill you get a month later just when you forgot you were there and now you owe someone thousands of dollars since your health insurance blows... just everything, I hate hospitals. If it were not for the drugs I have been promised and have my heart set on while delivering this precious baby I am carrying, I would have Keith clean out the hot tub and refil it with non-chlorine water and we would just have this baby at the house on the back porch and fire up the b-b-q and make an evening of it.... however my pain tolerance is ever so low, and I will require the massive needle in the spine to get things rolling. So, I am not one to over react when it comes to my physical well being, in fact, I heavily rely on google to diagnose me all the time. I made the mistake of mentioning my google MD preference to my OB at my last prenatal check up and she kinda got on to me a little bit; saying if ever I had any concerns please just call the drs office since there is always an on call OB there to answer any questions, well I was sitting at work on Thursday ...in my chair... with my feet elevated as usual... playing on my iphone...kicking ass in checkers when I started to feel some oddness in my chest. My heart to be more exact... like an unusual slow heart beat pattern that would ever so slightly pause, flutter for a few seconds.. and then get back to beating at a quasi-normal pace. Huh? That feels weird... not painful..... just weird. So it started happening every few minutes and I was getting a little weirded out so I head to the office (in the model home, from the living room where i was propped up on the sofa) and google my symptoms. I found that there were quite a few women who have this same complaint while pregnant. So after 10 minutes of internal conflict over whether or not to call my OBGYN, I figure, I have a precious life inside of me that is not my own, but is however, my responsibility. I call the dr, they say come on in... to the labor & delivery part of the hospital, we will check the baby and then we will send you over to the ER to run an EKG to check your heart. AHHHH shit... this is not what I want to do... I HATE THE HOSPITAL!!!! But I go, and am in and out of the Labor and Delivery section in NO TIME... I could talk about the chatty nurse but this blog is already way tooooo long. Then I go to the ER and spend the next 4 hours there... in a room.. alone... thankful for the TV but still... .after 4 episodes of FRIENDS and still no Dr. has come by (after my nurse swore i was 3rd on the list an hour and a half ago).... I get antsy. My EKG was normal, my blood pressure was perfect... my blood tests were normal... and everyone who saw me at the ER told me that "heart palpitations are completely normal in pregnant women, lots of extra blood plus weight and pressure of the uterus and yada yada its all normal, you will be fine) and yet i still lay there, on the worlds most uncomfortable gurney waiting for the doc to come check me out and discharge me... I lost it... i used the little red button to call for help, as if I were truly in despair, and i was. My cute little nurse came in to find me hysterical begging to just go home, please take this IV out of my arm so I can get home, its almost 10pm and Ive been here since 5, i am starving! and hormonal and my bag aches and I now know I wont die, at least not tonight so please, for the love of god, take this out of my arm, give me my clothes and let me leave! So I did... without seeing the blessed doctor... and went home. I HATE hospitals. And I am anxiously awaiting a mysterious invoice to find its way to me, with an outrageous ER visit bill enclosed.